Even before I became Trinity Dreamer in the summer of 2018 (well, the US summer…it was winter in New Zealand), I had always had 3 pieces of jewelry. My original trinity of jewelry was given to me by me ex-partner, Tracy. Early on in our relationship, he had given me a fossil leather bracelet and a necklace with a wishbone on it. The final piece of my trinity was received on July 19, 2012 at Mt. Hood National Park. I had been waiting for over a year and a half to receive a ring from him. I had given Tracy a ring symbolizing my love and commitment to him for Christmas in 2010. In My Story, I say that when I received my ring, it was when I received the most possession of my life, because I had always dreamed of being “married” to another man, of having a life and family together.

Those dreams of partnership, marriage, and family ended on January 1, 2018. On that day, I found myself ending my 9 year relationship with the only man that I have ever loved romantically. That story has already been written, but I bring it up now to share how important my 3 pieces of jewelry were to me.

  • The leather bracelet represented the past –  those hard places and times of our relationship.
  • The ring represented the present – my partner’s love and commitment to me.
  • The wishbone necklace represented the future – my wishes for being a husband, for being a father, and for having my family know and love the man that I love.

When I left Portland, OR on March 7, 2018, I gave back the ring to Tracy, as it now signified a broken promise, a romantic love and a commitment that had ended. I kept the bracelet and wishbone necklace, as they were gifts to me, but the gift of the ring I no longer wanted in my life.

I recently posted on Instagram my NEW trinity of jewelry (the featured image to this post), and I’ve had this new trinity since mid-April 2018. Here’s a better look at the jewelry and the colors involved.

I still have the bracelet, but these items no longer represent just my past, present, and future…

  • The leather bracelet represents MY past –  the hard places and times of my life, and my walk as a Christian.
  • The Cross necklace represents MY present –  my continual reminder of Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross, his saving grace being poured out for me as He bled to death, a symbol of death transformed into a symbol of eternal life.
  • The ring represents MY future – my wishes for being a husband, for being a father, and for having my family know and love the man that I love.

But they also represent my God, the Holy Trinity…

  • The leather bracelet represents God –  the God of the Old Testament, He destroyed the world with a flood, He punished people, cities, and nations for their sins. But He also sent His son to save all of us. The bracelet is a circle (which also represents God) and it is even a braid of 3 leather pieces…a trinity within a trinity of jewelry…a fitting representation for the mystery of God, who is so much more than just the God of the Old Testament.
  • The Cross necklace represents Jesus –  Humanity’s continual reminder of Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross, his saving grace being poured out FOR ALL as He bled to death, a symbol of death transformed into a symbol for eternal life.
  • The ring represents the Holy Spirit – The Hebrew word for Spirit is “ruach” and it means “air in motion”. “Ruach” is the same word for “breath” and for “life”. This side of Heaven, for as long as I have breath and am in motion, I will always have the Holy Spirit in my life, a part of God IN ME.

And if I haven’t given you enough trinities yet, there is even a trinity of colors in my jewelry…

  • Gold
  • Silver
  • Blue

I don’t have meanings for these colors, but interesting that gold and silver have always had incredible value throughout history, and blue is the color of the sky and of water. Clean water has and always will be the most valuable substance on earth. And as precious as all of those things are, my God, the Holy Trinity, is even more valuable to me.

Well, I hope you’ve enjoyed this analysis of my jewelry. As I pared down my life and possessions in preparation for my adventure in New Zealand, I have left myself with meaningful, beautiful reminders of who God created me to be. I am Derek Michael Shaw, Trinity Dreamer, a homosexual Christian!